There is nothing worse than being in a crowded place and trying to figure out where your boyfriend went. Even worse, is when you don't even have a boyfriend and you are in the crowded place aimlessly asking people if they are your boyfriend or not.
You're on the subway. This is your view.
1) This woman is probably not your boyfriend.
2) This woman is actively looking through her purse to avoid being your boyfriend.
3) This empty space can be used to imagine what your boyfriend looks like. Keep this one in your pocket.
4) Also a good candidate, though is sitting suspiciously too far away to be your boyfriend.
5) This is a foot.
Okay, so once you've focused in on who you think your boyfriend is. These are the important questions you need to ask to really make sure.
- How much money do you make?
- Can I sit next to you?
- Cats or dogs?
- What are your feelings on the Israeli-Palestinian conflict?
- Oh wow, I don't mean to come across as rude, I just didn't think a foot had so many feelings on the Israeli-Palestinian conflict.
How to make sure you don't lose your boyfriend who doesn't exist again.
Put a shoe on that foot.
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